A shepherd was herding his flock in a remote New Zealand
pasture when suddenly a brand-new BMW X5 four wheel drive advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.
The driver, a young man in an Armani suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window as he slid to a halt by the shepherd.
“If I tell you exactly how many sheep you have in your flock” the young man asked, “will you give me one?”
The shepherd looked at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looked at his peacefully grazing flock.
“Sure, why not?” he calmly answered
The yuppie got out of his vehicle, whipped out his Dell notebook computer and connected it to his Vodafone mobile phone. He surfed to a NASA page on the internet, where he called up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location which he then fed to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opened the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exported it to an image processing facility in Hamburg in Germany.
Within seconds, he received an email on his Palm Pilot that the Image has been processed and the data stored.
He then accessed a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with sophisticated pattern recognition formulas. He uploaded all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, received a response.
Finally, he printed out a full-colour, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turned to the
shepherd.
“You have exactly 1586 sheep,” he proudly announced.
“That’s right,” said the shepherd. “Well, I’m a man of my word, so you can take one of my sheep.”
He watched the young man select one of the animals and looked on in amusement as the young man stuffed it in through the rear hatch of the X5.
“Before you go” the shepherd said. “If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my animal?”
The young man thought about it for a second. “Okay, why not?” he replied
“You’re a consultant." said the shepherd.
“Wow! That’s correct,” said the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?”
“No guessing required.” answered the shepherd. “You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew; to a question I never asked; and you don’t know crap about my business. Now give me back my dog!”
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