Trevor the farmer was in the fertilised egg business. He had several
hundred young layers (hens), called ‘pullets’ and eight or ten
roosters, whose job was to fertilise the eggs. The farmer kept records
and any rooster that didn’t perform went into the soup pot and was

That took an awful lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells
and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone so
Trevor could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now
he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by
listening to the bells.

The farmer’s favourite rooster was old Gordon, and a very fine
specimen he was too. But on this particular morning Trevor noticed old
Gordon’s bell hadn’t rung at all! Trevor went to investigate. The
other roosters were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing. The pullets,
hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. But to farmer
Trevor’s amazement, Gordon had his bell in his beak, so it couldn’t
ring. He’d sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.

Trevor was so proud of Gordon, he entered him in the Yorkshire Show
and Gordon became an overnight sensation among the judges.
The result: The judges not only awarded Gordon the No Bell Piece Prize
but they also awarded him the Pullet surprise as well.

Clearly Gordon was a politician in the making: Who else but a
politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted
awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace
and screwing them when they weren’t paying attention.

Do you know a Pullitician called Gordon?


Originally Posted On - a now defunct site. I moved the content here for posterity. The date of this post is the date that it was originally published on that site.